Worth It

Ready?

Set!

Are you sure this is a good idea?” Asks Burns.

GOING!!

Burns bought the coaster for Christmas in 2010.   I wanted to try it.  The ‘old me’ would have tried it, backwards, sideways, with kids in my lap, with kids running at my heels.  The ‘old me’ would have tried it.  But the ‘new me’ is old. 

Sometimes I look at the coaster and I think it is the least little thing.  It isn’t a three mile jog up the hill, it most certainly isn’t a motorcycle.  It isnt’ a cliff to ascend, or a cliff to repel.  It is nothing but plastic molded for children.  It is nothing.  It isn’t even on my when-I-recover list.  It is smaller than that. 

I feel like an excuse when I look at it.  I feel that way when the trampoline mocks me, when I couldn’t move the boxes in the garage where the inversion table rested, when I found my old handicap sticker.   It is hard to say no for a body that houses a soul which yearns to say yes.

I miss saying yes.

Today Moose asked who would take turns with him.

I said yes.

I SAID YES!

It took me a year of healing before I could try it!  And my foot went numb, a little.

But I said yes.